I recently ran across something quite amazing… my diary. Well, as much of a diary as I kept. I am not a big journaling person, which is why I am trying to get my kids to do it regularly. There are very few entries, but I thought I would share the short series in this journal that was found while we were cleaning up the books in the school room last week. It was a very strange feeling to be reading the thoughts of an 18 year old ‘me’. I don’t remember this journal/diary and I certainly don’t remember writing the things I wrote. The final entry (we will get to that in a few weeks of ML) made me go to hug my hubby. Oooh, suspense 😉 I am not editing what was written, you are getting me at 18, like I was.
May 12, 1995
I’m sitting home on a Friday night, i”m in the mood to write, so here it is.
Graduation is 2 weeks away. I’m scared. The real world is waiting to destroy the fine balance I hold on life. what is I don’t make it? I’m that near failing government class. I’m on contract because I’ve skipped too much. I’m excited about going. I am ready for the challenges of college life. I’m ready to see what God has in store for me. I’m worried that I’ll fail some way, not find a job to repay my loans.
Then there’s Venezuela. I’m going on a missions trip. It’s eating my whole summer! My friends will all be having parties and getting drunk and I’ll be out of reach teaching the Bible and building cabins. It’s a great thing to do do, but I still have those nagging doubts. I feel very lonely right now. All of my friends are doing something with someone. Can is out with Nikki at a movie. I no longer hate either of them. I want him to be happy so I feel better. I think it truly was love. god has someone out there for me I hope. I want him to be strong in faith and stature. I’d like him to be tall and smart. I’d like him to play the piano if possible.
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